Thursday, August 13, 2009

Unfortunate names

Image from Queer the Pitch

There are some names that one should try to avoid when bestowing a babe with name that will follow them for the rest of their lives.
Take for example Russell Jay Kuntz, who pronounces his last name "Koontz". As a child he got the nickname Rusty, and when combined with his last name, the endearment becomes a candidate for the Drag Name Hall of Fame.
We offer, (2) for your further consideration that my mother had a friend Marion Harding High School, named Ann Schaffner, a delightful woman who's family operated the local highline Mortuary. Ann married Warren Schiltz. They named their eldest daughter Constance because it was a beautiful name, and worked well with the Germanic last name.
Poor Connie.
A graduate of Shaker Heights High School, she endured the jokes about her name with grace and a deaf ear. No child should have to go through life with a name that reminds people of "diarrhea".


  1. in my high school, there was a lovely young lady...& her last name was outhouse. though i think her name was madeline, it really didn't matter what name her parents gave her, now did it?

  2. Is it too late to comment? I worked at a community college learning center way back, and there I met the nicest, quietest, white-haired lady with a bun on the very top of her head named Wanna Ball. The poor dear.