Image from Queer the Pitch
There are some names that one should try to avoid when bestowing a babe with name that will follow them for the rest of their lives.
Take for example Russell Jay Kuntz, who pronounces his last name "Koontz". As a child he got the nickname Rusty, and when combined with his last name, the endearment becomes a candidate for the Drag Name Hall of Fame.
We offer, (2) for your further consideration that my mother had a friend Marion Harding High School, named Ann Schaffner, a delightful woman who's family operated the local highline Mortuary. Ann married Warren Schiltz. They named their eldest daughter Constance because it was a beautiful name, and worked well with the Germanic last name.
A graduate of Shaker Heights High School, she endured the jokes about her name with grace and a deaf ear. No child should have to go through life with a name that reminds people of "diarrhea".