I have planted my own tree

Like Helen Lawson, yes, I have planted my tree.

Four in fact.  "Duraheat" birches, at that.  It involved an awful lot of driving around, but we found them halfway to Philadelphia.  But our neighbor the landscape architect was very specific about these trees and their heat tolerance.

These trees are not scrawny trees.  No - these trees are broad trees - trees that have a span.

And to make sure my trees will grow, we cut down SIX other trees including a 100ft tall pin oak (that was the final word from the tree service)  that could have taken our house our the neighbor's house out given the right combination of wind and prolonged rain.  It really threw me into a giant funk, too.  The day it came down I was moody, bitchy, sad, upset and easily aggravated.  It was the universe, exacting its revenge because someone else planted that tree and made it their tree and I ruined that dream and had an eighty-year-old dream cut for firewood.

In the end, these trees are better situated for the lot and in a couple years will give shade and a nice filtered light.  And none of them will grow so big as to kill anyone should the right mixture of water, wind, and rain take them out.

What I really wanted was a weeping willow, but those are illegal in the city and their root systems can go out 100 plus from the base of their trunks in search a water source.

So one is named after Helen Lawson, the other after Neely - they are planted together, by the way - and then the other two are Barbara and Sharon.   Couldn't remember the names of either of the characters in the damned movie.

Now go out there and plant your own tree, and earn your oats while you're at it.

And remember, SPARKLE NEELY, SPARKLE!

ONE LAST THING.  If you are a Maryland Resident and Plant a Tree, You can get cash back from the state!  Go to Maryland's Forestry Division and get your coupon.  Coupons must be presented at the time of sale.