Make my stuff, your stuff

Well, we have survived another annual garage sale.  Thankfully, the COMMITTEE that handles this annual event held it this past weekend instead of the hottest weekend of the summer as they have in the past.  And reader, we sold a shitload of stuff.  But DEAR GOD, a 7 A.M. start date?

As in the past, we had the regular players, but new people came along, too:

7:05 A.M.
LEGO MAN, "Do you have any Lego?"
Cookie: "No."
LEGO MAN: "I can wait here while you look.  Be sure to check in the back of the closets."
Cookie: "You know, I understand that a sale in the 600 block of W. Joppa Rd.* is clearing out the toys that a collector has socked away for years.  Another man looking for Lego's said the was heading over there when they open at 9."
LEGO MAN: "Thanks for the tip.

9:15 A.M.
Mid Century Modern Man: "What table has you mid-century modern items?
Cookie: "Those sold completely out before we even opened."**
MCMM: "Who starts a neighborhood yard sale at 7 A.M.?"
Cookie: "People who have things to do by noon."
NOTE: This guy shows up in classic Volvo wagon, and always looks like an L.L. Bean threw up on him.  But he smells of canine cologne and as if he spent the night sleeping in a dirty ashtray.

9:30 A.M.
Vintage Camera Man: "You got any vintage cameras?"
Cookie: "Well as you see we are down to a "Take and Tinker" Snowthrower, some CD's, some decorating trinkets, a lawnmower, and some other stuff that nobody wants."
VCM: "So you don't have any vintage camera equipment?"
Cookie: "Guess not."
VCM: "Well I am looking for vintage camera equipment."
Cookie: "Have you looked at other sales?"
VCM: "I'm looking around.  You're sure you don't have any inside?"
Cookie: "I'm pretty sure I am not going to check inside for something that isn't there."***

10:05 A.M.
Vintage Playboy Man: "Where are your vintage Playboys from the 1950s?"
Cookie: "I'm a child of the 1960s and I have no idea where my father kept his stash back then."

10:07 A.M.
Snoopy woman: "I think it vile that he's looking for pornography at a community yard sale."
Cookie: "That reminds me we must have 300 pounds of vintage gay porn from the 1980s in the basement to bring up..."

But the kick in the balls moment came at around 10:45 when we were down to some unloved CD's, some brass trinkets that belonged to my late stepfather, and some DVD compilations that a neighbor begged us to see for her.  The husband is shuffling things around and getting ready for the 11 A.M. close when a young woman and her son come down the street.

Child: "Mommy, whats in this box?"
Mommy: "It's a game called "Trivial Pursuit"
Child: "What's that?"
Mommy: "It's a game that people like your great grandma used to like to play back in the olden days."****

ANYHOW, here is Cookie's way of getting ready for a yard sale, and it starts the year BEFORE the next yard sale.

What you need is to go to Target and buy about three to six green (or purple, or red, or blue) storage tubs.

Throw preprinted price stickers into each bin.  As the year progresses, when you come across something that doesn't tickle fancy, price it, and put it in the bin. 

Once it goes in the bin, it doesn't come out of the bin until the Yard Sale.

Bin full up, pull out another, repeat.

On yard sale day, All you need to do is set up the tables and carry out the bins and set it up.


* I made that address up. Every year we go through this with this twit, so I had to get rid of him.
**I would never put anything MCM in a yard sale.
*** In my mind was "Would you please get your head out of your ass because I have said no like four different ways."
**** Oh. You. NASTY. Snatch!  Fuck you, Mommy.