Tuesday, October 6, 2009

We interupt our regularly scheduled programming...

You know you are getting old when you remember when television stations would sign off each day with this test pattern. With the invention of 24-hour TV, there are more and more people running about who think that this is some sort of joke. "Did they really show this on TV? Why? Didn't they have any informercials back then?"
But the test pattern did several things. It allowed TV-stations (that's what we had before "channels") to calibrate their cameras, after the Late Late Early Late Show with Lillian Gish ended. This tested their their output and put something on the screen to tell people to "GO TO BED." It usually followed by a couple hours of static, during which the unsettled beings on another dimension would coax small girls named Carol Ann to cross over into their world. Then, as if magic, Dave Garroway would appear with a chimp to wish you "Good Morning" and you knew that it was time to let reality back into your life.
Of course this classic fell out of favor when TV joined the real world of living color, and then the wole idea of a test pattern went the way of the Dodo when cable came about.
So if you day gets to overwhelming, just stare into the pattern and tell yourself that your need to recalibrate your world, and then meditate for a few seconds. When you come to, this will be staring you in the face. Arise and feel fresh as a peppermint patty.

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