So I received a message from an acquaintance. She wanted my mailing address. Said she wanted to send me something to help me through the isolation period that we are all trapped in.
That was my first mistake.
My second was opening the package.
My third was pulling it out of the package.
The gift?
A facemask made from one of her bra cups.
"For when you go to the grocery store," the enclosed note said.
Maybe, if I shopped at Walmart. But I don't.
"Does she understand that you're married to a man?" asked my husband.
I think so, I said.
It was nice that she thought of me.
No, I did not try it it on, but I did shriek when it dawned on me what it was.
Do I send a thank you note? What is the social convention for this kind of unsolicited gift?
Do I send her a mask in return made from a jockstrap?
So if you are thinking of sending me something for a while? Don't. I'm not opening it.
I've seen the jock strap mask .... no sewing required.
ReplyDeleteNow THAT'S agift.
And the more well used the better.
DeleteScratch and sniff? Ewwwwwwww. Jx
ReplyDeleteIn the land of milk and honey.
Deleteewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
ReplyDeleteA mutual friend of Zelda's asked "Did yours include the embroidery rosette? Mine did." I must have gotten the other one.
DeleteYes definitely send a thank you card, otherwise you look like an ungrateful boob.
ReplyDeleteYou win the comments for the day.
DeleteThanks for tipping me off. I had the exact same thing all wrapped up (mit a bow!) and ready to ship to you!
ReplyDeleteI used a DD cup, you've got quite a punim.
Always thoughtful Norma.
DeleteI Vote for the Jockstrap Mask in a show of reciprocity, perhaps she'll get the hint... or was this a Gag Gift to begin with to give you a jolt and a Laugh, I would Hope so?!? One of the Kiddos once wore my Bra as a Hat, damn near fit over the Child's whole Head, that single Cup... I still Smile when I think about it, but I couldn't even Imagine someone wearing one as a Mask... not even the People of Wal-Mart... and that's saying something! *Winks*
ReplyDeleteI won't even take Boob Money when we have a yard sale, so the idea of putting a bra cup mask that even you don't want to put your boob in is something I can't even fathom.
Delete