Sunday, February 11, 2018
Anger and Charges of Elitism: Thursday was not my day
Thursday morning was not my day.
I am knee deep in my HUGE project for the year when two shoes dropped.
Shoe number one involved a young woman in a Facebook group (isn't always in a Facebook group) who called Cookie an elitist for wanting to know what we could do to get more people involved in an online discussion on Shaker's foreclosure blight. Following the collapse of the real estate markets in 2008, Shaker's Lomond and Moreland neighborhoods were dealt a blow as houses went into foreclosure and Cleveland economy as a whole went into the toilet.
Cookie contended that the discussion online was well and good, but that more people needed to be heard and give opinions. Young lady, fresh from a shaker education and college found that idea to be "Elitist" and "none of (your) business whether or not people participate."
The young lady who called me an elitist then went on to:
1) Announced that not only did she receive a Shaker Schools Education, but that her education was superior to mine because "You didn't even graduate from Shaker." (This is true. But she knows not why. It had nothing to do with IQ, but everything to do economics and personal safety) and,
2) Announced that not only had she graduated from SHHS, but that she had graduated from Sarah Lawrence, and,
3) Stated that her sister held a high ranking position within city hall and that her sister had also been a Shaker graduate and graduated from Yale, and,
4) Her other siblings had graduated from Shaker, etc., and,
5) Moreover, her parents still lived there.
All of this meant one thing to the young woman, she, not I, was better able to judge what was best for the discussion.
Here's the thing about this young woman: she may have learned a lot at Shaker and at Sarah Lawrence, and how nice for her that she could attend such a school, right? But the one thing that she didn't learn was that you don't call someone an "elitist" because they want more people to be involved in a discussion. And if you do call someone an elitist, don't lord your imagined superiority over them.
Because the Young Lady was outing herself as a bully, and an ignoramus who IS the true elitist.
This was followed by others jumping into the fray, which resulted in the young lady shucking her elitism and 1) calling Cookie a loser, and 2) doing victory posts - "Samantha (not her real name) shoots and scores over Loser Cookie and "Samantha is on record that Cookie is a loser." In other words, the ignoramus proved her point about herself.
Evidently, she was never cursed with self-awareness. But she was embarrassing herself.
In any event, a moderator defenestrated her from the group. I received a message from Mickey saying that "Samantha was removed for violating the rule on bullying, and being a total douche bag."
This was good news as I don't have time for people like Samantha, and it answers the question that indeed, women can be douche bags. which I thought was a male-only club. "Women are never "douchenozzles" - that is a male thing." Thank you, Mickey!
Shoe number two involved a distant cousin who sent Cookie a package between Christmas and New Years that arrive at Cookie Manor about a week before I went west for the week to work. The package contained two booklets, written by the distant cousin - the second set she sent. Somewhere, things got mixed up and Thursday there was a little Facebook (again with the Facebook) note asking if I got the envelope and I acknowledged it through the Car's system while driving by speaking two short sentences "Yes, I got them. But I don't think I'm ready to write my own just now."
This was followed shortly by a great amount of unpleasantness, and the accusation that I am self -serving. I understand and admit that I breached the thank you note. But self-serving? Hardly. In fact, I am rather offended by this.
I care about this distant cousin, and I own my mistake. But this huge project that I have been working on has come out of my time and money. I have never asked for anything in the way of money to help propel me into archives on the West Coast, and I have never asked for money for anything related to the family in anyway. I have always shared whatever I have found with whoever asked for it. I am not in this for glory, I am in it for the benefit that everyone receives. And I have never gone around and thumbed my nose at anyone, or giving anyone a "Nanny nanny bo-bo" and stuck out my tongue.
I am hoping that we can get beyond this. I forgive her for being purposely mean, my hope is that she forgives me.
So I hid under a rock this weekend. To the young woman who is really named Samantha, I wish you well, but until you grow up, and after you get some life experience under your belt, I hope we never cross paths. Once you get a few years of practical adulting under your belt, I'll buy you coffee at McDonald's, because that is not at all an elitist place.
And as for my cousin, I hope that you can forgive me because I do miss you, and I know that you truly carry the weight of your world on your shoulders.