Friday, October 12, 2018

You all have been warmed, Cookie is getting a mother fucking cold

Well, the husband came down with a cold two days ago cold, and it stands to reason that my cold is beginning. 

Today has been spent with watery eyes, sneezes and my body temperature has had a few spikes, tonight the snot is running.  My body is letting me know that I am about ready to become a miserable burden to mankind.

When a man gets a cold, we all turn into our version of Camille.  Misery loves company, but when we are sick we want ALL the attention.

I have been called for jury duty on Tuesday, and there is nothing I would love more than to show up in the jury pool, eyes red and weepy, hacking a lung up, harvesting lung butter into a tissue.  That to me is an automatic "Challenge!" from serving the system.

Be forewarned, if this a cold coming on, it ain't going to be pretty.


  1. Wow! After reading this, I think I've done well the past couple of days, peeing out of my butt (poop shouldn't be liquid) and sleeping on folded towels. One cannot help one's farting while asleep can one and waking up abruptly realizing that farts aren't supposed to be liquid either. At least I lost five pounds. You sound much more miserable! This makes me appreciate Balder Half. He rarely gets sick, and when he does, he quietly dies without bothering anyone else.
    Seriously, take care of yourself and get better.

  2. Im not sure which is worse, your nose butter or Deedles' s liquid farts.

    1. Maddie, the nose butter is worse. With L.F.s you can at least breathe! You can't cough or sneeze, but you can breathe.
      Sorry, Cookster, I really need to get a filter!

    2. Deedles, I'd have a doctor look at liquid shit tea if I were you. If you have it for a day and a night, the the doctor's alright. The worst case of that that I came down with we were able to tie it to a bread maker and sourdough bread starter. Remember, fiber is your friend, but stay hydrated.

  3. ew ew ew! I have not had breakfast yet this morning, and now I'm not so sure I want ANY!

  4. Soup,I says, soup!

    And I read the warning about Deedles, so i skipped her comment.

  5. Feel better...Fluids...Keep the high temperature at bay...Rest...Binge on Netflix...Just take care of each other...

  6. 3 days coming. 3 days with you. 3 days going.