Wednesday, August 6, 2014

The old woman, that N****** Obama and me

So, Cookie was sitting in a the Timonium, Maryland Best Buy yesterday, waiting for the phone rep to come back with my old iPhone (which I was trading in), when an old woman using a walker meandered near me.

I found this odd, because Best Buy is not usually a place where the old and the decrepit congregate - that is a Rite Aid thing.  And she looked like she was wearing what could have passed for Stella Toddler's clothing.

But she slowly was walking around looking at all the technology that she never imagined in her life.  She had to be 90.

So I sat there playing with my new iPhone, and she comes up and says:

"I think Dr. Ben Carson is a good man to run our country, not like that n***** Obama."

At first I looked up at her and then around to see who she was talking to.  No one else was within 20 feet.

She was talking to me.

Since working at the Beef House and Strip Club, Cookie has been on diplomatic autopilot.  Because our clientele can be pushy and condescending, you have to have control of yourself and your mouth.   Because it really is easier to smile at these assholes than it is to engage in their lunacy, which you can't change with your outrage, so conserve your energy, right?

So my immediate vocal reaction was to say "I'm sorry," with a healthy dose of sarcasm, and return to my phone.

But she took that to mean I didn't understand what she had just said, or perhaps she wondered if she had said what she wanted to, or something else, or whatever, and she started to repeat the offending statement.  I stopped her in mid "Cars..."

I explained that I was "sorry, but I don't care to hear about your politics," since that was the nicest way I could think of to tell her to shut the fuck up.

"Well," says she in a huff.  "I have a right to speak my opinion."

Bottom line, she does.  That is what makes this country great.  We all get an opinion.  And she is entitled to it, no matter how racist, how hateful or stupid it is.   And the Constitution protects that opinion, in the right she has to criticize the government without fear of retaliation.  The down side to this is that she has a Constitutional right to her offensive and bigoted opinion, no matter how unwelcome it is.

So in forming my response, I did a couple calculations in my mind:

1) This was not a teaching moment on the offensiveness of the term "nigger" to African Americans, or my ears.  Why, because at 90+, this decrepit old woman, who spent her days sitting in front of FOXNews wasn't going to change.  She also looked like she wasn't going to make it to the 2016 primary season, either.

and 2) Causing a scene would make it look like Cookie was giving this woman a tongue lashing for being sweet (which she was not) and old (which she was) in that order.

So my response was "I don't care to listen to your political opinion, good day."

With that she tottled off.

And then a Best Buy employee came up and asked if the Old Crazy One was with me.  I said no, and he started towards her to help her.  I wonder went on in her mind when a six foot man, dark as midnight, walked up to her see if there was anything she needed help with.

Cookie knows that we live in troubled times.  And Cookie does live south of Mason Dixon line, so technically, Maryland is in the south.  And old habits die hard for the ignorant. But Cookie is also glad that the old woman will naturally go to her reward, and when she meets God at her reward, I'm hoping for her sake that God is a black man or woman.   Because that is the moment she will cower.


  1. I'm hoping the god she meets is a big black gay drag queen.
    Tell her how to think and dress!

  2. you were so much nicer than i would've been.

    1. Sweetie, if she were in your chair, would have given her a butchie cut?

  3. "Because it really is easier to smile at these assholes than it is to engage in their lunacy, which you can't change with your outrage, so conserve your energy, right?"

    I must remember and practice this more often. Some of the 'characters' coming into the gym on my shift have been getting under my skin lately.

  4. Yes! This is why I read your blog.

  5. This comment has been removed by the author.