Saturday, November 27, 2010

Jason does have a point

As Jason has pointed out, it always does, PEOPLE magazine - that must have of medical waiting rooms everywhere - has decided that they will decide for all of us who the Sexiest Man Alive is.  Are we excited?


This year, unless you've been dead and haven't already heard the news, they chose Ryan Reynolds, best know for his starring roll in ABC's long dead sitcom Two Guys, A Girl and Pizza-Something-Or-Other.  He was also known for being the "ex" of Alanis Morrisette.  Here's the cover:

Now don't get me wrong, Ryan is fetching, especially when he starves himself and works out 24 hours a day for a project. And I'm sure he is charming and very sweet.  I find him "pretty", but is he "sexy"  To a certain demographic, yes, but is he currently the sexiest man alive?

Perhaps the people at PEOPLE said, over the disco beat at their editorial board meeting "We can't do Clooney, Again - that leaves us with who?"

C'mon PEOPLE, the Sexiest Man Alive should be someone that excites man and woman alike, not just teenage girls riding the hormonal "big one" as they come crashing into their boobage years.  The Sexiest Man Alive should take one look at you and set your heart to aflutter.  He should raise your pulse, and make you feel faint. 

Its been years since Hollywood has produced such a man.  Take for instance Clint Walker, the man who just might have been PEOPLE MAGAZINE's 1962 Sexiest Man Alive (if there had been a People Magazine back then):

Now just in case you you don't grasp the difference in sexy, lets do this side my side, OK?

See what I mean?  Clint is SEXY, but Ryan is "Fetching".  Which of these two men, in their prime would you rather be ravaged by?  Beefy, muscular, 6'5" Clint, or "Body by Jake" Ryan? 

Still don't believe me?  OK, lets try this: Robert Conrad (vintage 1968) vs. Ryan Reynolds: Who is sexier.


Or Robert Conrad?

I thought so.

Look, you can put Ryan Reynolds up against just about any man (the Fabulous Nathan Gunn, for instance) with the exception of anyone in politics, Rush Limbaugh, Ryan Secrest, Prince Charles, Ron Jeremy and/or Steven Hawking, and there is a good chance that the other guy will be sexier.


  1. Yes! Now that's what I'm saying.
    Which brings me to a later post of mine....
    My Sexiest Men Dead edition.

  2. Sorry to intrude here; I didn't see an email address listed for you.

    I have a friend named Gary Adams who grew up in Shaker Heights. He would have graduated high school there in 1975 or possibly 1976. If you knew him, can you drop me an email?
    Thanks very much.
    brotherparish [at] gmail [dot] com