Why it's Miss Minnish, the newly retired girl's gym teacher from the grade school. She's come to spread sunshine, and smoke from her Phillip Morris. "I snip the filters off because they interfere with my rich, full tobacco enjoyment."
Vonda came over in her nightie to show us her cat's costume. Never mind she is her underwear. She just had to show us King Ferdinand of Tiggie-Whompers and his Kitty Costume of Good Cheer. "He thinks he's the ghost of Christmas past." Yes, Vonda, that's it exactly.
Aunt Faye has shown up. Fay was supposed to be here Yesterday. She and Miss Mannish don't get along. As long as Faye stays in the living, and Mannish stays in the den, we should be OK. I should add that Fay is pissed off, she is judging you. "Did Dom leave me here and drive back to Bayonne? That bastard." And Faye is not in the holiday spirit. Not. At. All.
And then these two assholes showed up, complaining about their sled. "Sled's need snow, Steve, and we ain't got none," Aunt Faye had to opine.
As for Cookie, I am looking forward to getting the house back to ourselves. Merry Christmas, all y'all.
Seat me next to Aunt Faye... we'll both exchange sour comments about the fact that you've seated us on a sofa with plastic slipcovers... like what? We're dirty? We gonna leave a stain? Hrmph. And tell Gert to join us... and to bring the bottle with her. Kizzes.
ReplyDeleteHappy Christmas all y'all! xoxo
ReplyDeleteFab-u-lous party, dear! I'm having a whale of a time in the kitchen with Aunt Gert, stirring-up the shit between Aunt Faye and Miss Minnish. Jx
ReplyDeleteThat is some Guest List... Hope Christmas was survivable and that your New Year is a prosperous one.
ReplyDelete