Saturday, July 26, 2014

Features tell, benefits sell

But does it come with its own "answering cervix"?

Cookie often wonders, not who comes up with these ideas, but who buys them.

And then uses them.

And I mean uses them beyond the once or twice that they seem goofy fun.

And why doesn't the real phone look like the advertised phone?

Is this an objet d' art, or art that should be objected too? 

And where is the stunning detail, the highlights in her hair.

And, according to this image, one does not speak into her secret lady place, but into the leaves betwixt her knees.

And shouldn't her absent nipples flash red when an incoming call is announced?

And Cookie wonders who has more money than sense to plunk down $350 for it on eBay.

Yes, Cookie wonders.

Because, you see, if Cookie could find one, he would send it to Mr. Peenee as a NOLA housewarming gift.


  1. And why is there a fig leave?
    I guess 'cause it's art and all.

  2. I'm with you wondering who would buy such a thing? But can you imagine the face of an unsuspecting person unwrapping this? Now that would be priceless, especially if you were johnny on the spot with the camera!

  3. "Whispering snatch, don't tell the trees, 'cos the trees don't need to know."

    Peenee'd love it!


  4. It's the kind of gag gift that would truly make one gag.

  5. Darling, it's the thought that counts. And right now, I'm thinking "Thank god Cookie can't get this."