Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Nextdoor: Something foul is afoot

What we have is a breakdown in society!


So, how many of you belong to Nextdoor©?   If you do, then you'll understand the following, with the names regrettably changed to protect the dimwits in the neighborhood to our north.

For those of you who do not know what Nextdoor© is, its site/app that acts as a listserv for one's neighborhood.  There are neighborhoods that you are referred to join, then you also get included on information and posts from other area and regional neighborhoods, but nothing too far from where you live.

People sell things on the site and buy things.  They look for contractors.  They share safety messages.  Its all like a listserv, but with a site/app and all the pretty pretties that modern design can do.

But people also make horses asses out of themselves on Nextdoor©, like the residents in one established neighborhood that declared war on their neighborhood association Board, then proceeded to air their opinions of the board in the group. Sort of like KFC people discussing the secret recipe in Board Room of Popeye's.  Savvy?

Yesterday, amongst the ISO's* and LTB** and the ALTGROAPBMS's*** there was this thread:

"Something Foul is Afoot"

Angie: "I don't know what this world is coming to but I hung a down comforter on the line behind my house to air it out, and someone snuck in and stole it. What is wrong with people?  

Well.  Society is defiantly breaking down according to this person.   But the responses also mimicked this sentiment.

Michael: "Who would do such a thing?"

Andrea: "This is why I don't let me children play outside unless I can supervise."

Tomiko: "Some people just need to be slapped upside the head."

Steven: "I think we need to start a neighborhood watch.  For what we pay in taxes, this has got to be stopped!"

Gwynn: "We need to take our neighborhood back!"

Todd: "I can arrange a meeting at St. Somethingorother's Community Room and demand that the County Chief of Police attend."

Cookie: "Sounds like a case for Miss Marple.  Oh, wait.  She only does murders.  Pity."

Marilyn: "Angie, I found your comforter, it was laying in a heap between our houses - it's a bit muddy. The wind might have picked it up and carried it if you didn't clip it to the line.  I put it on your back stoop."

Thom: "Last week someone stole two new planters from my friend's front door over in Edgewater."

Gerri: "My husband and I are installing deadbolts.  This world is cracking up. And just so everyone knows, we have a gun."

Angie: "Thanks Marilyn, I feel kind of foolish.  I never thought that the wind could pick it up, but that seems more rational than someone stealing it.  It's my daughter's so it has sentimental value.  And the dry cleaners have it."

Gwynn: "We need to take our neighborhood back!"

Michael: "Steven, I know the Rector at the church.  I can make arrangements for the meeting."

Estelle: "What kind of sicko would steal a child's blankie?"

Marilyn: "Estelle, we had gusty winds yesterday.  No one stole it.  It blew off the line.  Let it go."

Guy & Susan: "This is why we lock and arm the alarm on our house."

Tomiko: "Gwynn, just who do we need to take our neighborhood back from?"

Gwynn: "Evildoers - they are everywhere.  This is why President Trump is going make us all safe again when the budget comes out."

Cookie: "SQUIRREL!"

Gwynn: "I think someone needs to mind their own business."

Tomiko: "Gwynn someone needs to keep their politics off this board, and mind her own business before shooting off a back handed comment to someone else." 

Allen: "Can the moderator shut this thread down?"

Tomiko: "If Gwynn hosts any part of the progressive dinner, I am not going."

Moderator: THREAD CLOSED

Strangly, Tomiko doesn't even live in our neighborhood.

But know that I have seen her spunkiness, I think she'll be our guest at our neighborhood's progressive dinner in June.

Take that, Gwynn.

* ISO: In Search Of
** LTB: Looking to buy
*** ALTGROAPBMS: Anyone Looking to Get Rid of a Pottery Barn Microsuede Sofa - I KID YOU NOT.  This was a post from some twit in Roger's Forge, as in "Would anyone be looking to get rid of Pottery Barn sofa in good condition, no rips or tears, from a pet free house.  Looking to spend less than $200.  Thanks!" Bitch PLEASE! ~ Cookie.

8 comments:

  1. Sounds just like Nextdoor out here on the Left Coast in Oakland!

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    1. I know! But every week, its a little soap opera, or someone is asking for something weird.

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  2. jesus h! some of those assholes should be bitchslapped!

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    1. Well, evidently this seems to be fairly common across the board.

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  3. Old school works for me. I just look at the community bulletin board at the local grocery store.

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  4. I had to get out of Nextdoor. It was a horrible horrible program for multiple reasons.

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    1. I can name several of them. Trust me, I am as annoyed with it as anything. But on some level, there is just too much of Gladys Kravitz in me to let it go.

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