Monday, April 4, 2016

The husband ain't crabby no more!




YES!  Yesterday it was the flu, and today the husband had a little outpatient hernia surgery that has been scheduled for WEEKS in advance of the flu.  The doctor said that our little flu shouldn't dampen the husband's appointment with the knife, so here we are.

The husband seems to think that he'll be back to his old self in no time.

Yeah, right.

So I was up at 4am so we could get him to the doctor at 5:30am for a 7am. procedure.

I planned to exact some level of revenge for getting me up at an ungodly hour.

In the past, I usually exacted said revenge when he's coming out of the anesthesia by telling him something outlandish.   After his wisdom teeth, I told him our dogs had puppies.  On another occasion, in the midst of a heatwave, I announced it was snowing.

Today, I told him that I love him in spite of "the vagina that the doctor accidently installed" instead repairing the hernia.

Yeah, I am that kind of bastard.

I do this not to freak him out - he played along.  I do this to get the nurse's reaction.   Why?  Because I am that type of bastard.

So now bully boy is sleeping it off.

My big job will be to keep the dogs from crawling all over him.

So he may not be crabby no more, but Cookie plans to be crabbie for the rest of the week.

Hopefully, though, in a month or so he'll be in fine form working in the garden.

9 comments:

  1. being on the receiving end of THREE hernia surgeries, take care of his needs. oh - and if he's on painkillers, have him drink some mineral oil (tasteless) every few hours. He'll thank me later.

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    1. He's afraid that the Exxon Valdez will slip out of his ass from the mineral oil.

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    2. well.....that's a different discussion.

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  2. LOL!
    I love that kind of bastard!

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  3. You're my kind of bastard, unless you're doing the bastardly deeds to me!

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    Replies
    1. Shall I tell Carlos to tell the doctor "No, its not his adenoids, it's his man pussy..."

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  4. florence nightingale, that's what you are.

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    Replies
    1. Nurse Ratched comes to mind. Jx

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    2. I give and I give and I give until the very marrow of my soul is drained, and then I give some more. Yeah, that's me.

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